sh1t happens..

[revolter00]

* Taoism: sh*t happens.
* Confucianism: Confucius say, "sh*t happens."
* Buddhism: If sh*t happens, it isn't really sh*t.
* Zen Buddhism: sh*t is, and is not.
* Zen Buddhism #2: What is the sound of sh*t happening?
* Hinduism: This sh*t has happened before.
* Islam: If sh*t happens, it is the will of Allah.
* Islam #2: If sh*t happens, kill the person responsible.
* Islam #3: If sh*t happens, blame Israel.
* Catholicism: If sh*t happens, you deserve it.
* Protestantism: Let sh*t happen to someone else.
* Presbyterian: This sh*t was bound to happen.
* Episcopalian: It's not so bad if sh*t happens, as long as you serve the right wine with it.
* Methodist: It's not so bad if sh*t happens, as long as you serve grape juice with it.
* Congregationalist: sh*t that happens to one person is just as good as sh*t that happens to another.
* Unitarian: sh*t that happens to one person is just as bad as sh*t that happens to another.
* Lutheran: If sh*t happens, don't talk about it.
* Fundamentalism: If sh*t happens, you will go to hell, unless you are born again. (Amen!)
* Fundamentalism #2: If sh*t happens to a televangelist, it's okay.
* Fundamentalism #3: sh*t must be born again.
* Judaism: Why does this sh*t always happen to us?
* Calvinism: sh*t happens because you don't work.
* Seventh Day Adventism: No sh*t shall happen on Saturday.
* Creationism: God made all sh*t.
* Secular Humanism: sh*t evolves.
* Christian Science: When sh*t happens, don't call a doctor - pray!
* Christian Science #2: sh*t happening is all in your mind.
* Unitarianism: Come let us reason together about this sh*t.
* Quakers: Let us not fight over this sh*t.
* Utopianism: This sh*t does not stink.
* Darwinism: This sh*t was once food.
* Capitalism: That's MY sh*t.
* Communism: It's everybody's sh*t.
* Feminism: Men are sh*t.
* Chauvinism: We may be sh*t, but you can't live without us...
* Commercialism: Let's package this sh*t.
* Impressionism: From a distance, sh*t looks like a garden.
* Idolism: Let's bronze this sh*t.
* Existentialism: sh*t doesn't happen; sh*t IS.
* Existentialism #2: What is sh*t, anyway?
* Stoicism: This sh*t is good for me.
* Hedonism: There is nothing like a good sh*t happening!
* Mormonism: God sent us this sh*t.
* Mormonism #2: This sh*t is going to happen again.
* Wiccan: An it harm none, let sh*t happen.
* Scientology: If sh*t happens, see "Dianetics", p.157.
* Jehovah's Witnesses: >Knock< >Knock< sh*t happens.
* Jehovah's Witnesses #2: May we have a moment of your time to show you some of our sh*t?
* Jehovah's Witnesses #3: sh*t has been prophesied and is imminent; only the righteous shall survive its happening.
* Moonies: Only really happy sh*t happens.
* Hare Krishna: sh*t happens, rama rama.
* Rastafarianism: Let's smoke this sh*t!
* Zoroastrianism: sh*t happens half on the time.
* Church of SubGenius: BoB sh*ts.
* Practical: Deal with sh*t one day at a time.
* Agnostic: sh*t might have happened; then again, maybe not.
* Agnostic #2: Did someone sh*t?
* Agnostic #3: What is this sh*t?
* Satanism: SNEPPAH TIHS.
* Atheism: What sh*t?
* Atheism #2: I can't believe this sh*t!
* Nihilism: No sh*t.